Monday, June 4, 2018

A Weight Lifted

I did it. I actually did it.

I can’t believe how free I feel.

The advisement I had at CSUN made me realize where my motivations were. I already knew that being a radiologic technologist wasn’t my ultimate desire. I told my parents that I didn’t have a desire to pursue my bachelor’s at CSUN. There was too much money, too much time that I felt I couldn’t balance.

And despite how free I feel… I have no words.

Doubt’s telling me that I’ve made a mistake. That I’m throwing away security of my future for something that I should have no hand in. That the path my heart is pulling me towards is something that will bring me to ruin and failure.

But doubt was there when I was still following a plan I had no passion in. At least, not the amount of passion that such a condensed and rigorous course required.

This time, I finally heard my mother say it.

“I’m waiting for your book, Jodee.”

Now that is a challenge I’m willing to take.

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